Death wish

I dont want to regret not planning my own funeral before i finally pass away. I know i may sound too off on this one. But at least, if i die. Hoping that it wont be anytime soon. My family and friends would already know what I really want to happen. Its being realistic. 

If that day comes. I want to be cremated. Simply because im just too claustrophobic to be inside a coffin and I know make up of dead people isnt really the nicest thing in the world. Plus. I dont want people to see me there inside the coffin dead. So i want to be cremated. Surrounded by lots and lots of flowers. White flowers. In beautiful arrangements. Surrounded by my portraits. Pictures. Selfies. A lot of it. I want to fill the plaxe with a lot of happy memories. I dont want my wake to be full of sadness like any other wake. I want to be remembered as someone who is happy and strong. I dont want to see negative pictures of me. I want pictures of me and my family being placed in all corners of the room. 

I want ny thoughts to be in the place. During my wake. I want quotes coming from my twitter or my blog. Those that really comes from me. I want to be remembered by my thoughts. I think its one of my most prized possession. To be able to express my thoughts in a way that i inspire a few people here and there. 

I want to have a lot of testimonies from good friends every service. I want to be remembered with a lot of good memories. So i want my wake to be full of good memories. Photos all over. Video clips all over. Prized possessions all over. 

I want to be placed in either a granite or dark colored marble vase. On the day of my last wake. I want everyone to wear white with black ribbons in their right arm. I want to have flying ballons as a sign of me finally going to heaven on the last day. 

I want to deliver this message to everyone in my wake:

"I know by now, i am already gone. And i thank you all for being here. And for being part of my life. I may not mention each one of you. But you know who you are. I know in one way or another, we have shared something special that bought you here. And to that Im deeply grateful. Not everyone can finally prepare their own wake. But me. As you all know it, plans everything ahead. And i dont want to miss planning my own funeral. I want to thank each and everyone of you here. I will surely miss you. But life goes on. Just because im gone physically it doesnt mean im completely gone. I will always be with you and you will always be a part of who i am. I made this message simply because I want you all to remember that at this very moment. Even if i am gone. I am thinking of each one of you. Its time to let go and its time to move on. Thank you for making me who i am until the very end of my short life. Thank you for letting me experience what its like to live with such amazing people. I thank God for letting me know you all. I am in a very peaceful place know. I know we will miss each other but this is not the end. Live your life to the fullest. We will see each other again soon. Farewell."  

I hope this is not too much to ask for those people left behind. If you are reading this. And I might already be gone. Please make this last request of mine happen. 

-Z