Reading the Bible

In every suffering, there is only one comfort that I can depend on. And that is the comfort that God brings. Every single day.

I feel ashamed to admit that I grew up in the church. With all the sunday school, church camps, yet I did not grew spiritually. I was a fool to disobey God and his commandments. I knew the basics, but never really pondered on them. I knew the bible verses by mind, but never really sought after them by heart. Its was just until then, that I find comfort in the word of God. It was until I have nothing that I took delight in reading the Bible.

I ask God to sustain the faithfulness that is in me right now. For with my own might, I cannot do this all alone.

Reading the bible again from the book of Gensis makes me realize a lot of things. I have so many questions now. I have so many realizations after reading the story of Adam and Eve. Cain and Abel. Noah. Seth. Abraham. Isaac. Down to Moses. Their struggle against all nations. Their faithfulness and disobedience. Everything in between. As I ponder upon every story. I can't help myself but do side research on every story. I guess it only shows how interested i really am in knowing the word of God.

But the story that shed tears to me was the story of Joseph the dreamer. After his brothers betrayed him. I just cant help but be amazed on how faithful he is to the word of God.

Its ironic that people would see dying people turn to God. I guess its because when your days are numbered. Its only when you realized how blessed you are no matter what. Its only when you realized a lot of things that life itself is all about Jesus. On how He saved us from our sins. How His grace is just overflowing for a sinner like us.

Aside from reading the bible from Gensis. Im also watching the series called The Bible. It helped me imagine things on everything that was written.

I am not without sin. I sin. Everyday. But I have been blessed and I humbled myself before the Lord everyday asking for forgiveness. Truly, I am unworthy of everything but He is still blessing me everyday.

Jesus is real. He is moving within me. And no one could separate me from Him. People may judge my relationship with Him. Even my cousin questions my relationship with God. But that would not stop me from growing spiritually. Only God sees the desires of my heart. Only He knows whats on my mind everyday. Only He knows the relationship I have with Him. No other people can judge me with that.

We have all been called to different purpose. Mine might be fulfilled once I die. I dont know. But I just pray that people reading this blog would soon realize that Jesus is coming. That His words are true. We all have different ways to bless people. I believe God gave me HIV not as a punishment but as a testament of how he uses people that others may believe and follow him.

I will never get tired of learning from the word of God until my last breath. Lord. Help me to be faithful.



-Z

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